************************************************************** * * * CYBERSPACE * * A biweekly column on net culture appearing * * in the Toronto Sunday Sun * * * * Copyright 1999 Karl Mamer * * Free for online distribution * * All Rights Reserved * * Direct comments and questions to: * * * * * ************************************************************** Blair bitchin' One of the net's great initial promises was that it was going to counter balance the traditional media's ability to influence public opinion. Netizens, armed with web pages and email lists, were going to stop mass media generated hype cold. In 1998, People magazine ran a poll asking netizens to vote for the sexiest celebrity. A backlash saw a Howard Stern character named Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf outpoll Leonardo DiCaprio by a 10-1 margin. The net can turn on its own self generated hype too. Netizens rapidly turned on Lucas after Star Wars: The Phantom Menace failed to live up to a year of mounting expectations. Despite the backlash, The Phantom Menace still managed to break box office records and wind up as one of the top grossing movies of all time. People magazine got about 200,000 more visitors to its site than expected, making banner advertisers happy. It's becoming clear these net-based campaigns are generally ineffectual. Remember the gas boycott that was supposed to bring the oil companies to their knees on April 30th? I filled up at 61 cents a litre yesterday. Still, it can be fun trying. The Blair Witch Project is the latest pop phenomenon to suffer the indignity of media-saturated netizens. The low-budget horror flick has been labeled by various critics, who should know better, as one of the scariest movies of all time. Like, nearly as scary as The Exorcist or The Shining. I suppose movie critics have waited a long, long time to shout the equivalent of "It's the new Beatles!" In reality, the Blair Witch Project is not a bad film. It has some okay scary stuff, but it didn't make me want to sleep with a crucifix around my neck for a week. Netizens, partially to counter the media hype over the film and partially to counter the lunatics who claim the movie is based on fact, have formed an Anti-Blair Witch Project web ring to gripe about the film and parody it. Many of the sites use the genuine Blair Witch site's look and feel (www.blairwitch.com) and play on the movie's now familiar opening text "In October of 1994, three student filmmakers disappeared in the woods near Burkittsville, Maryland while shooting a documentary." The phrase would probably be destined to enter the popular lexicon like "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away..." if it were not for the fact its too long to remember. The best execution of the look and feel is The Blair Bitch Project (www.madpickles.org/bbp/). The site's designer chronicles his quest to see the film before it went into wide release and his utter disappointment. The anti-Blair site at creative- homeliving.com/blair/antiblair.htm has a cute opening page graphic and as well as the theme from Bewitched. The site lists the movie's scariest moments, which include the scene where they lose the map (suggesting the movie will last longer) and shots up Heather's nose in her apology scene. The Bewitched Project at home.att.net/~chmilnir/bewitch/index.html runs with the tie in suggested by the anti-Blair site. The Bewitced site seeks to discover the unexplained disappearance and replacement of the sitcom's first Darrin Stephens incarnation. While most of these sites tend to play on the "witch" angle, The Blair Warner Project site at www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Lounge/3027/Blair.html makes a cute departure and ties the film in with the '80s sitcom The Facts of Life. The character Tootie investigates strange happenings when students mysteriously vanish after seeking hair and make up tips from uber-teen Blair Warner. No witch parody would complete without a nod to the Wizard of Oz (see www.wickedwitchproject.com). Toto's journal under the Aftermath link is particularly harrowing: "My life is a hollow lie. The dusty plains of Kansas have nothing to offer me anymore, with the drab gray landscape stretching out before me like a thousand squandered opportunities, without even a fire hydrant to break the monotony."